The Blog I Never Use

In honor of Rizzle's post of June 27th, in which he used malapropisms, either coincidently, or (what I prefer to believe, because I think Ryan is a comic genius) on purpose, I shall here mention a few terms which no one should confuse except in the cause of comedy.

As James clarified on Ryan's blog, an epitaph is a statement about the dead, a epithet is said about the person you wish was dead.

A genius is a person with a very high level of intelligence, a genus is a group or type, like categories of biological entities or versions of Trivial Pursuit.

An illusion is something performed by a by a magician usually with little skill, an allusion is a device used by an author with skill (I said illude for allude yesterday).

An Abbess governs nuns, the abyss is the bottomless pit of hell you'll be cast into if you don't do what she says.

One dissembles to keep the truth from being revealed but one disassembles to fit something into a box or to see how it works.

Using whips was performed by certain monastics who were ascetic, but art is commonly judged by whether it fits a certain aesthetic.

The aforementioned whipping was an act of flagellation, but cows are supposedly destroying the ozone layer through acts of flatulation.